Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
