idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
