Already got asked if we're dating
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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