around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
