Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize