yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Randomize
