yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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