You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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