3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
