Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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