maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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