worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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