A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize