Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
