I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
