Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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