my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Fuck appropriateness.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
