Well apparently he's into motor boating.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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