i may or may not be watching the land before time
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize
