you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Boobs speak an international language.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
