Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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