Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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