you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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