My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
A+ Viking dick
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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