If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
