What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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