is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
