Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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