so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
