Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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