You're completely useless in the revolution.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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