We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
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we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
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in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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