He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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