I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
two words: eviction party
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
