pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
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