Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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