She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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