Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
