Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
