Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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