if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
