They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
a search helicopter?!
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
