So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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