So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
