You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
