you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
A+ Viking dick
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
