just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize