i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
