That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
