I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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