I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize